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Marital Problems 12/16/2004
A woman and her husband who are having troubles being sexually
interested in each other decide to go see a sexual therapist.
After a pyscial examination and interviewing them therapist
says that they can be helped if they will follow the following
instructions.
<br>
He tells them that they are to go home, and that night she
is to take a glazed donut and impale it on his ...
0 Comments, 58 Views,
17 Votes
,1.99 Score
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Gay Yuppies. 12/16/2004
Any one hear about the two gay yuppies? Gerald fits John,
and John fits Gerald.
2 Comments, 27 Views,
13 Votes
,0.63 Score
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How to live longer 12/14/2004
A man asks his Doctor how to live longer, Doctor asks him:
U smoke? "no"
U drink "no"
U gamble "no"
U love sex "no"
Then what the fuck U want to live so longg for?
1 Comments, 22 Views,
21 Votes
,4.73 Score
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Blond Photography 12/14/2004
Guy is married to this beautiful if somewhat slow witted
blond. He comes home from work one evening during a HUGE
thunder storm to find his wife running around the yard in
the pouring down rain, stopping occassionally to strike
poses as the lightening flashes about her. Confused he
runs over to ask her what she's doing outside in this
weather to which she replies, "isn't it wonderful, ...
0 Comments, 31 Views,
35 Votes
,1.39 Score
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Clinton and Dubya 12/14/2004
Clinton and Bush are marooned on a desserted island. One
day a rubber raft floats up on shore and laying in the raft
is a beautiful, naked sleeping woman. Clinton turns to
Bush and says "Lets screw her" and Bush says
" Out of what?"
2 Comments, 59 Views,
9 Votes
,4.71 Score
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Ugly pick up artist 12/14/2004
A man is sitting in a bar accross from an incredibly beautiful
woman. Pretty soon the ugliest guy he has ever seen sits
down and starts talking to her. After just a few minutes
they get up together and leave. The next week he is in the
same bar and another beutiful woman is sitting at the bar
and the same thing happens. The incredibly ugly man sits
down talks with her for a couple of ...
1 Comments, 82 Views,
31 Votes
,3.14 Score
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morning wood 12/13/2004
Whats it called when a man wakes up with a hard-on?
<br>
Morning thickness
1 Comments, 8 Views,
0 Votes
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buzzzzz 12/13/2004
One day a young man and woman were in their bedroom making
love. All of a sudden a bumble bee entered the bedroom
window. As the young lady parted her legs the bee entered
her
vagina. The woman started screaming "Oh my god, help
me,
there's a bee in my vagina!" The husband
immediately took her to the local doctor and explained
the
situation.
<br>
The doctor thought for ...
0 Comments, 51 Views,
17 Votes
,5.81 Score
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Harrassment 12/13/2004
A man walks up to a woman in his office each day, stands very
close to her, draws in a large breath of air and tells her
that her hair smells nice.
<br>
After a week of this she can't stand it any longer! The
woman goes into her supervisor's office and tells
him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit against
the man and explains why.
<br>
The supervisor is ...
1 Comments, 31 Views,
19 Votes
,4.84 Score
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The two ants *** 12/12/2004
There are two ants living in a girl's pair of panties.
One day they decide to go exploring in the caves. They said
to meet back in the same spot in and hour.
So, one ant went in one cave, and the other ant in a different
cave. After an hour went by, the two ants met back up.
One ant was covered in brown, sticky, smelly stuff. "Eeew!,
What was your cave like" asked the other ant.
...
0 Comments, 29 Views,
17 Votes
,1.85 Score
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Mr. Brown. 12/11/2004
Mr. Brown the old history teacher had a dirty mouth. He was
always saying something off color or suggestive.
One day after class, Sally approaches his desk with a flock
of girls in tow.
"Mr. Brown, " she said, "We are tired
of your filthy remarks and we aren't going to put up
with in anymore! The next time you say something nasty in
class, we are all going to complain to the principal." ...
0 Comments, 28 Views,
26 Votes
,2.70 Score
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Ahhh....Tequila! 12/10/2004
A guy walks into a bar and notices a very large jar on the counter
and sees it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. The
man guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it!
<br>
He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's
with the jar?" "Well, you pay ten dollars ... and IF you pass three
tests, you
get all the money!!!" The man certainly isn't
going to pass this up! ...
2 Comments, 40 Views,
14 Votes
,5.22 Score
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why does peater pan fly 12/7/2004
why does peater pan fly if your peter was hit with a pan youd
fly 2
0 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
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say the darndest things 12/5/2004
Yesterday, my neighbor was reading a 's book
about animals to her grandson, little Bubba, who just turned
3 a few months ago. "This is a pig. What sound does a
piggy make?"
<br>
"Oink ! Oink!" said little Bubba.
<br>
"This is a cow and what sound does a cow make?"
<br>
"Moo! Moo!" said little Bubba.
<br>
"This is a ducky and what sound does ...
1 Comments, 43 Views,
8 Votes
,1.16 Score
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What would YOU like for Christmas? 12/5/2004
A little boy sits on Santa's lap. Santa says "I
bet I know what you want for Christmas, " and with
his finger he taps the boys nose with every letter he spells
"T-O-Y-S".
<br>
The little boy thinks a second and says, "No, I have
enough toys."
<br>
Santa replies once again tapping the boys nose with every
letter, "C-A-N-D-Y."
<br>
Again the little boy ...
2 Comments, 35 Views,
8 Votes
,3.25 Score
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Sleep studies 12/5/2004
What your sleeping position says about you!
<br>
According to a new article in 'Cosmopolitan'
magazine, they say
the position you sleep in says a lot about you.
<br>
They say women who sleep on their sides are sensitive, women
who
sleep on their stomachs are competent, and women who sleep
on
their backs with their ankles behind their ears are very
popular.
0 Comments, 43 Views,
19 Votes
,2.73 Score
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Little Johnny 12/4/2004
Little Johnny has to take a piss so he hads to the public John
to go.
<br>
As he is pissing a sailor walks in and starts ppissing next
to Johnny.
<br>
Johnny looks up at the sailor and asks, "Are you a
REAL sailor?"
<br>
the sailor replies, "I sure am."
<br>
Johnny then asks, "Can I wear your hat?"
<br>
And the Sailor says, "Suuure"
...
2 Comments, 29 Views,
21 Votes
,4.12 Score
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A defendants plea 11/30/2004
"So let me get this straight, " the prosecutor
says to the defendant, "you came home from work early
and found your wife in bed with a strange man." <br>
"That's correct, " says the defendant.
<br>
"Upon which, " continues the prosecutor,
"you take out a pistol and shoot your wife, killing
her." <br>
"That's correct, " says the defendant.
<br>
"Then ...
1 Comments, 13 Views,
6 Votes
,5.36 Score
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Here's a Great *ucking Commentary. 11/30/2004
Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words
in the English language today is the word "*uck".
It is the magical word which, just by its sound can describe
pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
<br>
In language, "*uck" falls into many Grammatical
categories. It can be used as a verb both transitive (John
*ucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was *ucked by John).
<br>
It ...
4 Comments, 13 Views,
7 Votes
,4.06 Score
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Something's wrong somewhere 11/29/2004
After 9 years of sex in the dark, a wife discovers her husband
was using a vibrator. She asks for an explanation, he says,
"I'll explain the vibrator, but you first explain
the !"
1 Comments, 27 Views,
2 Votes
,5.20 Score
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Open question... 11/29/2004
HEIGHT OF UNEMPLOYMENT: Cobwebs in the pussy of a .
<br>
HEIGHT OF TECHNOLOGY: A condom with a zip.
<br>
HEIGHT OF SOPHISTICATION: Sucking nipples with a straw.
<br>
Now, what's yours?
1 Comments, 14 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
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Oops! 11/29/2004
MESSAGE FROM TOCARO CLINIC:
<br>
Sir, we regret to inform you that the redness on your penis
was not cancer; it was lipstick. We deeply regret the pointless
amputation and would like you to contact us so we can suggest
an alternative.
1 Comments, 24 Views,
4 Votes
,5.19 Score
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Recreation 11/28/2004
What's the BEST thing about fucking 29 year olds?
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
<br>
There's twenty of them.
1 Comments, 7 Views,
18 Votes
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Sales Assistant 11/27/2004
A new sales assistant was hired at a large dept. store. On
his first day, the sales manager took him around to show
him the ropes. They were passing by the gardening section,
when they heard a customer asking for grass seed.
The sales manager stepped in and said, "Excuse me,
but will you be needing a hose to water your lawn?"
<br>
The customer replied, "I guess so. I'll take ...
2 Comments, 30 Views,
26 Votes
,7.02 Score
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busy blonde 11/27/2004
how do u keep a blonde busy for hours???
Scroll Down for answer......
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0 Comments, 33 Views,
23 Votes
,4.18 Score
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The 10 most important people in a Women's life 11/26/2004
1. The doctor because he say's, "Take off your
clothes" 2. The dentist because he say's "Open
Wide" 3. The hairdresser because he say's "Do
you want it teased or blown" 4. The milkman because
he say's "Do you want it in the front or the back"
5. The Interior Decorator because he say's "Once
you have it all in, you'll love it" 6.The banker
because he say's, "If you take it out you'll
lose ...
1 Comments, 52 Views,
31 Votes
,5.64 Score
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A man's 80th Birthday present... 11/25/2004
A man's doorbell rings on his 80th birthday. He answers
the door to find a beautiful woman in her 30's, dressed
to kill and looking stunning.
She says, "Hi, your friend Saul sent me as your Birthday
present. Are you ready for some super sex?"
<br>
He replies, "Well, now that you ask... I think I'd
like the soup."
0 Comments, 33 Views,
19 Votes
,3.39 Score
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I was crying by the end 11/24/2004
> >>If you can read this whole story without laughing
then there's no
hope
> >>for you. I was crying by the end.
> >> > > >
> >>Note: Please take time to read this slowly.
If you pay attention to
> >>the first two judges, the reaction of the
third judge is even
better.
> >>For those of you who have lived in Texas, ...
0 Comments, 37 Views,
17 Votes
,4.96 Score
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Huh. 11/21/2004
There was a class and each student had to go up to the front
of the
class and say a sentence using one of their spelling words.
First
Juan goes up and his word was love so he says, "Sara
says she loves
me". Then it's Chase's turn and his word
is hate. So he goes up and
says, "Sara says she hates me". Then it's
Chris's turn and his word
is dictate. So he goes up to the frount ...
1 Comments, 10 Views,
3 Votes
,5.39 Score
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Wanna Know What "SOMETHING" Is? 11/20/2004
"Something" is when you grab around your dick
at the bottom with one hand and then grab it with the other
hand above it, and there is still two inches sticking out
the top! NOW THAT IS SOMETHING!
<br>
<br>
<br>
If you do that when you cock is soft that's "AMAZING"
1 Comments, 49 Views,
20 Votes
,3.38 Score
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