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What did the penis say to the vagina? 6/6/2019
Cover , going in!
2 Comments, 19 Views,
11 Votes
,1.67 Score
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What happend to the jokes? 6/6/2019
Jokes used to be amazing but seems like in our day of tech
and social media it has died.
3 Comments, 21 Views,
12 Votes
,2.80 Score
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Larger breasts please 6/5/2019
A woman asked her Dr. about breast enhancement. She claimed
that when she was younger men seemed to prefer women w/ smaller
breasts, but today's man prefers larger breasts.
Is there anything you can do? Why sure the Dr. replied. there
are implants for that purpose. A simple surgery and you're
now carrying larger breasts. NO! no surgery there must
be another way, something other than ...
2 Comments, 70 Views,
10 Votes
,2.79 Score
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Johnny and the Principal 6/3/2019
Johnny got sent to the principal's office by his teacher.
<br><br>
<br><br>
"Johnny, " the principal asked, "what
did you do this time?" <br><br>
"All I did was tell Bobby that Mrs Johnson has a great
ass, " Johnny replied. <br><br>
The principal frowned. "Johnny, you can't say
things like that about a ...
1 Comments, 60 Views,
6 Votes
,2.51 Score
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What kinksters say and what vanillas hear 5/31/2019
What kinksters say: "Are you kinky?" What vanillas hear: "Do you like anal?" <br><br>
What kinksters say: "I polyamorous" What vanillas hear: "I just haven't met the right person yet."
<br><br>
What kinksters say: "I am bi-sexual" What vanillas hear: "I am gay, I just don't want to admit it" ...
3 Comments, 48 Views,
15 Votes
,1.91 Score
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Flakes and Points 5/30/2019
Rule #87 watch out for flakes <br><br>
I swear this site keeps taking points away eliminating
chances to start conversations. This site is 100% built
to trick you into buying points...no thanks.
3 Comments, 16 Views,
11 Votes
,2.23 Score
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Knock knock 5/27/2019
Who’s there?
4 Comments, 43 Views,
14 Votes
,0.58 Score
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This Damn Sites IM 5/26/2019
can never messsage someone straight up
1 Comments, 14 Views,
11 Votes
,1.86 Score
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;) 5/25/2019
A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and
holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank
vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I
don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm
samples. <br><br>
The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples ...
1 Comments, 59 Views,
15 Votes
,2.06 Score
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Monday pic me up 5/20/2019
I met a guy with 5 dicks and I asked him how his pants fit, he
said like a glove!! <br><br>
<br><br>
best I got
1 Comments, 8 Views,
6 Votes
,3.65 Score
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joke 5/17/2019
whats white and red and black all over...whatever you want
it to be
1 Comments, 25 Views,
15 Votes
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Two Irish Nuns 5/16/2019
Two Irish Nuns visit New York City for the first time. Walking
through Times Square, they see a street vendor with a sign
" DOGS". <br><br>
"Look , sister, " says one of the nuns.
"They eat here in America." <br><br>
"We must try it, " says the other nun, "to
experience what it's like to be here in America." ...
3 Comments, 89 Views,
25 Votes
,2.14 Score
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joke 5/16/2019
this damn sites messenger
1 Comments, 9 Views,
7 Votes
,1.51 Score
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Knock Knock 5/12/2019
What up, <br><br>
My cock. <br><br>
8========D~~ (. )( .)
2 Comments, 26 Views,
17 Votes
,0.44 Score
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More Puns 5/11/2019
1. A vulture boards an airplane, carrying two dead raccoons.
The stewardess looks at him and says, 'I'm sorry,
sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger.' <br><br>
2. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other
and says 'Dam!' <br><br>
3. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit
a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it ...
1 Comments, 51 Views,
21 Votes
,2.51 Score
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Puns 5/11/2019
1.The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table
was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
<br><br>
2.I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but
it turned out to be an optical Aleutian . <br><br>
3. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. <br><br>
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, ...
2 Comments, 43 Views,
15 Votes
,3.13 Score
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The IRS joke! 5/8/2019
Mr Johnson got a notice from the IRS he might be audited,
and he should show the local IRS office next Monday morning 10. So, he called his attorney, and the two of them showed the IRS office 10, right on time. <br><br>
"Mr Johnson, " the IRS agent said, we have some
questions about some of your financial activities. into my office so we can discuss them." ...
1 Comments, 63 Views,
12 Votes
,3.15 Score
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Sex Life After Marriage 5/3/2019
It’s true when they say your sex life changes after you
get married, because now you are sleeping with a relative!!!
0 Comments, 26 Views,
13 Votes
,1.80 Score
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So there I was 5/3/2019
So, there I was..... Balls deep; and my sister stops, turns and says "Wow,
you know what? You are as big as Dad!" I was surprised, and replied "You know, that's
the same thing Mom said."
2 Comments, 29 Views,
13 Votes
,3.14 Score
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Back from Iraq 5/3/2019
A buddy of mine got back from Iraq, third tour as a marine.
They really do use camels as the main means of transportation.
They have to take a camel driving test, they give on mon., wed.
and fri. They have sex education on tues, and thurs. <br><br>
<br><br>
I ask him why and he said they don't want to wear the camel
out!!!
3 Comments, 43 Views,
14 Votes
,2.98 Score
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A Blonde Husband 5/3/2019
women were having lunch together, and discussing the
merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman says, "I
need to be honest with you, getting a boob job."
<br><br>
The second woman says "Oh that's nothing,
thinking of having my asshole bleached!" <br><br>
To which the first replies, "Whoa, I just can't
picture your husband as a ...
1 Comments, 47 Views,
11 Votes
,2.61 Score
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Testicles 5/2/2019
An American woman is in the produce department the local
supermarket searching for the best looking russet potatoes
she can find to bake in the oven for supper night. She
comes across a potato so large, she has to use both hands
to pick it . Just then a Middle Eastern woman sees it and
says; "Oh my, potato reminds of my husband's
testicles!" "Are his testicles this ...
1 Comments, 18 Views,
3 Votes
,2.45 Score
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Mosquito 5/2/2019
What's the difference between a and a mosquito?
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
<br><br>
A mosquito stops sucking after you smack it!
1 Comments, 4 Views,
1 Votes
,1.10 Score
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little Sally 5/1/2019
Little sally came home from school and told her mother
Frankie Robinson was showing his penis while on the playground.
Mother tried to respond but before she could little Sally
said, it reminded of a peanut. Mother said, you mean it was tiny? No said little Sally, it was salty
0 Comments, 39 Views,
12 Votes
,2.62 Score
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Corny 4/27/2019
What did Sushi "A" say to Sushi "B"?
<br><br>
Wasabi!
1 Comments, 9 Views,
5 Votes
,1.51 Score
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Sight? 4/24/2019
"I see", said the blind carpenter, as he picked
his hammer and saw.
1 Comments, 21 Views,
6 Votes
,1.94 Score
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Checking out the bar 4/23/2019
A guy is on a business trip. He sees a bar across the street
from his hotel. Entering the bar, he sees a sign on the wall.
It reads: Cheese sandwich $2.50; Ham sandwich $4.50; Hand
Job $10. <br><br>
Behind the bar are three beautiful women. He motions for
one to over. <br><br>
"Sweetie, " he says, "are you one of the
women who gives hand jobs?" ...
3 Comments, 68 Views,
9 Votes
,2.57 Score
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another 4/20/2019
what do you call a constipated detective? <br><br>
no shit sherlock!
1 Comments, 4 Views,
2 Votes
,3.81 Score
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Saturday fun 4/20/2019
I just picked up a new book, "the history of lubricants",
its non friction
2 Comments, 9 Views,
4 Votes
,4.02 Score
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Chinese Medicine 4/19/2019
While in China, an American man is sexually promiscuous
and does not use a condom the entire time he is there. <br><br>
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one
morning to find his penis covered with bright green and
purple spots. <br><br>
Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. <br><br>
The doctor, never having seen anything like ...
2 Comments, 71 Views,
7 Votes
,3.80 Score
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